deer

[asakiyume]

Deer have been wandering through the woods/swamp behind my house in the mornings, it's on their route from one place to another. I love how they're both present and invisible. You have to wait for them to move to see them, just ripples in the air, they blend in so well, but with watching eyes and their white-flag tails if they're startled.

I think with their camouflage they could wander across worlds and dimensions and centuries. It makes me understand why the shishigami, the forest spirit, in Princess Mononoke, is a deerlike creature.


He grants both life and death; maybe he moves between those worlds or states.

And it gives me new insights into the end of Chekhov's short story "Ward No. Six," where the main character, just before dying, has a vision of deer:

There was a greenness before his eyes. Andrey Yefimitch understood that his end had come, and remembered that Ivan Dmitritch, Mihail Averyanitch, and millions of people believed in immortality. And what if it really existed? But he did not want immortality—and he thought of it only for one instant. A herd of deer, extraordinarily beautiful and graceful, of which he had been reading the day before, ran by him; then a peasant woman stretched out her hand to him with a registered letter . . . . Mihail Averyanitch said something, then it all vanished, and Andrey Yefimitch sank into oblivion for ever.

(The collection of Chekhov short stories from which this is taken is available to read for free on Project Gutenberg).

I remember almost nothing about that story, except that image. ... I might reread the story. I took three books with me to England when we lived there as a family; a collection of Chekhov short stories was one, and I read and loved most of them. My memory isn't what it might be, but I know what roads to walk down to recover things.

And deer know all the roads, and how to be a part of the landscape and yet not of it. That's their magic.

Comments

[cmcmck]

Reminds me of Kurnnunos!

We get deer hereabouts to- something we never saw in our previous place of abode! :o)

[asakiyume]

I can understand people venerating deer!

[e_d_young]

What a lovely post!

Have you seen Mushi-shi? It's one of the few anime I'm aware of that is very suitable for grown-ups. I couldn't help but think of it when the forest spirit was mentioned.

"Present and invisible" describes much of our world/dimension, methinks.

[asakiyume]

I haven't; I'll have to look for it!

Yeah, we're pressed in close by invisible things so much that sometimes we can't even see the visible ones. Perception is crazy.

[kore]

This is so lovely. (And I love Chekhov, that's such a great story.)

[asakiyume]

I don't usually reread things (or not as an adult; as a kid I did a lot), but I'm thinking I might need to reread Chekhov's short stories; I think I want them closer to the surface of my mind.

And thanks :-)

[sartorias]

What a lovely image there at the top!

[asakiyume]

Yeah, it's a wonderful image in the context of the film, too.

[khiemtran]

I love the image of the herd of deer! Whenever I see deer beside the highway on my way to work, it always makes me think they're looking at me from another world.

[asakiyume]

And they *are*, both metaphorically and literally.

[amaebi]

Deer used to drift by our house in Fort Collins like mammalian clouds.

[asakiyume]

Mammalian clouds! What a perfect way of putting it. That's exactly what they're like.

[sovay]

And deer know all the roads, and how to be a part of the landscape and yet not of it. That's their magic.

This is a beautiful line in and of itself and also makes me want to know if you've seen Annihilation.

(For some reason I don't understand, your entries stopped displaying on my friendlist, so I thought you were just not posting for a week. I think I have fixed that now. I don't know what went wrong in the first place, though.)

[asakiyume]

I haven't seen Annihilation, but I've been very interested in what I've seen people write about it, especially Rachel. Some of the images from the trailer really appealed to me, but I wasn't sure how the potential incomprehensibility would.

Re: my entries, I'm glad you can see them again! And the truth is, I haven't been posting that often. I was thinking about it last night in bed. I was thinking about how little I end up *giving* online. The great thing about your entries--or one great thing; there are lots--is that you reflect on what you're talking about, especially in your movie reviews, but even if it's just a slice of your life. I feel like my entries are essentially "here is a thing. the end." I'm wondering if I have the mental/temporal wherewithal to change that.

[sovay]

I feel like my entries are essentially "here is a thing. the end."

I don't think that means you're doing it wrong! Please do not use my posts, or anyone else's, as sticks to beat yourself with for using Dreamwidth differently. You may note that people respond to the things that you post, even when they are "a thing, the end." That's not out of inertia.

[asakiyume]

What you say is true, and I need to remember that. I have some kind of dissatisfaction, and I'm not sure where it's coming from or why, but whatever it's from and whatever it leads to, I need to remember that there's nothing wrong, from my audience's point of view, with what I'm doing now.

[sovay]

I need to remember that there's nothing wrong, from my audience's point of view, with what I'm doing now.

And not just audiences. There's nothing wrong with it. They might not be the kind of posts you want to have the time and the space and the presence to write, but they're not wrong.