Terms of Service

[asakiyume]

Tumblr just updated its terms of service--you have to accept them before you can access the site.

Every now and then I've tried reading terms of service--just for the cussedness of it, just for the I'm-on-the-hook-legally-for-signing-this-thing-edness of it. And I'm reading, oh yes, so reading, look at me read! . . . And then before I know it, in fact all I'm doing is thinking about reading as I scroll rapidly down, wondering just how long terms of service can possibly be.

"I think the only people who read terms of service all the way through are the people who write them," said the ninja girl.

"They could probably hide all kinds of things in there and no one would know," I said. "If they wanted people to really read the terms of service, they could make it known that there are Easter eggs in there--maybe clues to a treasure or something," I said.

"They could put in excerpts from their favorite novels," she suggested.

"Or from their own!" I said. "You could serialize your work in the terms of service--people would be waiting with bated breath for the next update."

As it happens, people have found some interesting treats in Tumblr's terms of service, such as . . .





So there you have it. Tumblr's terms of service--more entertaining than most.

Comments

[queenoftheskies.livejournal.com]

How funny! (But, also smart because, people will be people, right?)

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Yes! And although the humor of Tumblr's wasn't enough to actually get me to read the whole thing, it did get me to read further, and more, than any other terms, and judging from comments on Tumblr itself, some people actually *have* read all the way through.

[stormdog.livejournal.com]

That's pretty cute.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

I thought so too. I wonder if they'll update with a more current figure as some other actor becomes the new flavor du jour.

[danceswithwaves.livejournal.com]

I like how they put it in "real people speak" after each legaleeze paragraph.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Very very smart!

[yamamanama.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I feel like certain sites (this means you, blogspot) either have a TOS to look good, or are really selective about enforcing it.

I can think of a certain someone who's mindbogglingly popular and hasn't even put behind a content warning wall.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

I do think it's quite possible places have them mainly for ass coverage. And, too, it could just have not very effective moderators. But if the guy you're thinking of really is actually violating the terms of service, I suppose you could try complaining?

… I definitely know that what's considered a genuine threat and what's considered mere hyperbolic language is sure. . . problematic. I bet YouTube's terms of service have something about not making rape threats to people, and yet there are a whole lot of YouTube trolls whose go-to criticism is a threat of rape.

[yamamanama.livejournal.com]

I sent a few reports.

[barry-king.livejournal.com]

Lovely. And to think I thought TOS were the modern equivalent of spoken spells; some gibberish you say to keep the lawyers at bay.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Nah, I think in the main that's exactly what they are. The trick, as yamamanama suggests, is how well they're enforced.

[c-maxx.livejournal.com]

Oh, yes, but we can ridicule or parody. Destroying them is OK, but pretending to be them is a no-no.

Hmm, we can't impersonate a real person, but we are not prohibited from channeling an unreal person, m. ninja?

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Well we hope ridicule or parody won't result in their actual destruction, but yeah, sometimes words can be as destructive as sticks and stones.

And channeling an unreal person for the win! Let's do it!

[dinahprincedaly.livejournal.com]

Love this entry

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Hee--I'm glad. All thanks go out to the ninja girl and Tumblr.

[zyzyly.livejournal.com]

They popped up for me today, and I thought "I should read this", but only got about two or three lines in before they defeated me. It's nice to know there are easter eggs in there. It gives me hope.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Yep, two or three lines were as far as I got, too--so I'm thankful for the diligent troopers who went the whole hog and found gems like the one above.

[khiemtran.livejournal.com]

What I'd really like is some sort of indicator of which parts other people have already read. That way there could be a sort of crowd-sourced verification of the thing. i.e. I wouldn't have to read all of it, if I could see it had already been read by so many thousand people, but if there were key clauses not many people had looked at, I could spend my time looking over them.

[heleninwales.livejournal.com]

That is an excellent idea!

Like asakiyume, I also start out with the best intentions of reading the ToS, just because, but after a few paragraphs my eyes glaze over and I find I'm skimming without meaning to.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

This is an *awesome* idea.

I know on certain music listening sites (Soundcloud is one, I think), you can comment at certain points in the music, and when people do, a little mark shows up underneath the sonogram (for lack of a better word--the jaggly electrocardiogram-looking thing that's a portrait of the entire piece of music) at that point. You can see what exact moments in the song people especially liked.

[vanatoomas.livejournal.com]

Sigh, I have turned back from these new terms twice... Well, *I* have wanted to proceed, but Tumblr has refused and suggested I should delete my account if I am not ready for new terms of usage.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

I confess I signed without reading the whole thing. Boy will I be sorry when it turns out I've promised them my house….

[dudeshoes.livejournal.com]

I would love to be Benedict Cumberbatch for a little while. I would like to see how he thinks about the characters he plays.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

I can't imagine! Have you ever known any actors? csecooney is the only actor I know (or the only one I can think of right now). She certainly seems to *inhabit* the characters she plays, but she's a stage actor, and I think they can get more totally into character maybe? (Plus she writes, so she's always becoming lots of people.) But even film actors must have to inhabit the characters they play, to do them effectively? Acting--the reality of it, anyway--is such a mystery to me! I would want to BE the characters, but that's not what's called for, I don't think. . .I think what you have to do is *present* the characters, present them so that the audience can see them and believe in them. … But I don't know. You like theater and film, both--what do you think?

[dudeshoes.livejournal.com]

In Method Acting, I gather, you do "become" the character. But then you have the immortal Sir John Guilgud, who said he could emote while thinking about his laundry list. My own view is that you have to tap something in yourself so close to the character that you can seem to be the character.

[csecooney.livejournal.com]

There are very clinical actors and very organic actors. Actors who work from the outside in, and actors who work from the inside out. Then the rest of us do whatever we have to do to get us there. Daniel Day Lewis I am not. But who CAN be, after all?

The strongest acting choices come from strong desires, especially when the desire meets with opposition. Remembering where you are coming from before you enter. Remembering where you are going to. Paying attention to everything. Reacting honestly. Playing with what is there. Connecting.

I don't know. The language can get wishy washy. The strength lies in the intent.

What do you want?
What does it cost you?

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

The language isn't wishy-washy, though! Not this here, that you've just written.

I've had your post about the letter you received and your response and your thoughts about what directions you liked/needed to hear open for forever. And sometime before forever ends, I will comment!

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

Or is it merely a parody or a mockery of a paragraph?