asa-no-ha moyō; a father's face

[asakiyume]

Asa-no-ha moyō

My third kid, Little Springtime, was born in Japan. Friends there gave us baby clothes for her that had this pattern on it. We were told that traditionally, this was a protective pattern that will keep babies safe.



I thought I'd like to make a quilt with this pattern for my arriving-in-April grandchild, so I wanted to find it online so I'd be sure to get it right. But I didn't know the name for the pattern. Imagine my amusement when I found out it's 麻の葉文様, asa-no-ha moyō. "Moyō" means "pattern"; "ha" means "leaf"; and asa (麻; also read "ma") means .... drumroll please... cannabis! (but also hemp or flax; all these things are related). In fact 麻 is the first character in the compound 麻薬, mayaku, which means "narcotic."

Japan is very strict with regard to drugs. It's something universities here have to counsel students who are going over on an exchange year about: certain ADHD medications are prohibited--Adderall, for example--and certain things that are over-the-counter medications in the United States are also prohibited (e.g., Nyquil). And let's not even talk about cannabis possession.

But in olden times, people knew another truth ;-)

A father's face

My dad frequently buys ham at the deli in his local Hannafords, so he's a familiar face there. One middle-aged woman behind the counter is always friendly to him. Yesterday, when he was there, she said,

"Do you know why I like you so much?"

"Is it that we know each other from somewhere else?" he asked.

"No--it's that you remind me of my father." She gestured to her chin to indicate my dad's beard. It turned out her father passed away two years ago. She and my dad got to talking more. "You've inherited his friendly ways," my dad said to her. It turns out she's from Iraq.

Sometimes people are angels in our lives, and I feel like he was one for her and she was one for him.

Comments

[raven]

This is such a lovely post, all of it. My dad was one of a kind, which is a comforting thought, but when I think about it, kind scholarly men with uncool facial hair are everywhere to be found, and that's a comforting thought too.

[asakiyume]

Aww,kind scholarly men with uncool facial hair 🥹

They could be as common as dandelions and still the one that grows through the crack in the asphalt on *our* walking route is very special and uniquely its own.

[sartorias]

Angels for one another--love that image.

[asakiyume]

Thanks--when an angel comes, the whole encounter is so much more luminous than the words can tell. And right now I'm thinking about how it radiates outward, because I wasn't even there, and I was so moved.

I like how luminous rhymes with numinous

[sartorias]

I love that, too. It's like one is tucked inside the other.

[amaebi]

Angel, after all, just means "messenger." In both the Hebrew and the Koine words that are translated as "angel."

[asakiyume]

Yes, that was in part why I felt that that's what they were for each other. Sometimes the message is something that goes beyond words, as I think was the case in that moment.

[amaebi]

:)

Beautiful.

[missroserose]

Your story about angels reminds me of an encounter I had a few years back. It was when I was just starting to be more mobile after my ankle healed; one of the big steps for me was redyeing my hair, which had grown out very salt-and-pepper while I was stuck at home healing. To celebrate, I did a fairly elaborate horizontal layering in pink, orange, and yellow.

Anyway, between lockdowns and then injury, my income stream from private clients had been iffy to nonexistent for years. So I applied and interviewed for a job at a swanky private club downtown. It turned out to be middling pay, but they had a strong benefits package, something you don’t see often in this field; the catch was that, as the (very nice) HR person put it, “We’re a conservative organization.” They liked me and wanted me on board but would’ve required me to either wear a wig or dye my hair a “natural” color.

Honestly, that descriptor was enough to tip me off that it wasn’t going to be a good fit, but I still was giving it some thought as I walked to the nearby food hall for lunch—-maybe I was being too precious about my hair color? After all, lots of people work jobs in places with appearance codes, who was I to turn up my nose? This was all running through my mind when I noticed the girl who was standing at the register had that distressingly-common-in-those-days retail-worker thousand-yard stare, the kind that comes from hours of dealing with stressed-out people who are upset and uncertain and taking it out on you. So I gave her a friendly smile as I approached, and was trying to think of something encouraging to say, when she caught sight of me and her whole demeanor changed. Like a dried-out ficus that somebody had finally remembered to water—her eyes went wide, and she smiled, and said with almost heart stopping sincerity, “Oh, I love your hair! It looks like a sunrise!”

I wish she had some way to know how much I needed that validation right then. But I like the idea that we were angels for each other, right when we needed them most.

[lokifan]

What a lovely story!

And a lovely post, too.

[asakiyume]

💛💛💛

[asakiyume]

Ah, this makes me tear up 🥹

You watered her, and she watered you.

**hugs**

[missroserose]

It kinda put me in mind of the parable of the sower. We toss out compliments/comments without even thinking, and most of the time, they're nothing more than a momentary pleasantry—but we never know which ones will take root in someone's mind. A good reminder to be careful!

This is completely unrelated, but I've been thinking about you re: book recommendations—are you familiar with Katherine Addison's work? I've been listening to a few of her books and they strike me as something you'd enjoy a lot—characters with a lot of intelligence and heart trying their best to make their way in a world that's sometimes cruel and sometimes surprisingly kind. I started with The Witness for the Dead and its sequel The Grief of Stones, about an impoverished but fundamentally decent minor government official whose job is somewhere between an attorney and a medium; right now I'm enjoying The Goblin Emperor, an Imperial bildungsroman set in the same world. It's got a lot of the same charm but the pacing is perhaps somewhat more deliberate. :)

[asakiyume]

Yes, I do know Katherine Addison--The Goblin Emperor in particular! I completely agree with your assessment, and I did enjoy the book. I've meant one of these days to follow up with The Witness for the Dead and The Grief of Stones.