Jun. 16th, 2014

asakiyume: (nevermore)
Alison Bechdel, "Gradual Impact"
[+, w/reservations]

This was both fiction and in cartoon format. I'd never read anything by her before, though the ninja girl had read, or at least dipped into, Fun Home, and told me about it (a little). I found it thought-provoking, with, as its title suggests, a gradual (and building) impact.

It's the story of a romance that the narrator resists, without understanding why, until other party, Tamar, asks, "Is it because I'm beautiful?" The narrator denies it, but later reflects,

But of course I was uncomfortable with her beauty, her flawless skin, along with her calm good humor, [which] left me nothing to latch on to.

This got me thinking about how relationships always involve inequalities, and about the barriers that differences in ease (privilege, if you like) can present.

People like the narrator need to be able to share problems; it can't be all one-sided (i.e., it's not enough that Tamar be willing to engage with the narrator's problems; the narrator needs Tamar to have, and be able to share, problems too), whereas people like Tamar can't share problems in a way that people like the narrator recognize as problem-sharing. So, yeah, not a good match.

I was at first hugely put off by the prominence of My Dinner with Andre, a film I despise. But whatever--it's key for the characters, and really, it could be any film.

ETA: On second thought, it couldn't be any film, but it could have been some other intellectual, talk-y film, and not necessarily My Dinner with Andre.

Let the record please reflect that I really dislike My Dinner with Andre


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